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10.) Tully Nuts contain Drano, just not enough to kill you
9.) The minimum age requirement at our hotel was 60, however, Cassidy was able to sneak us in because he has some kind of pull with hospital geriatric wards
8.) 2 words, no fishing
7.) Smitty's intricate driving directions backfired on the way home because his house was blocked like a fortress in the Franco-Prussian war with detours from a stupid bike race.
6.) Joey Dell turned Echo's into the Playboy mansion, but Hef (Smitty) was having none of it
5.) Dinner was a disaster, the $20 burgers on Friday were replaced with Pizza drier then a old lady's cunt on Saturday
4.) Fiore stalked Quinn and JCa$$ on Saturday creating an unpleasant drinking atmosphere at Keenan's and forcing the beleagured drinkers to Pull that!..one too many times
3.) no one came close to Count Jackula's 19 Tully Nuts, although on Friday we gave a valiant effort.
2.) JCa$$ and Quinn's Saturday consisted of watching 1990's basketball games and playing at an arcade reserved for 11 year olds
1.) Braun did not "Catch A Big One"