VanillaAfro.com

[Wolf]

I think our championship team this season is very similar to the 1996 Chicago Bulls NBA Championship team, arguably the greatest in sports history! So, here is a player by player comparison from these two sports dynasties!

Steve Kerr – Kevin Wolf (Both have very nice outside jump shots! This doesn’t really help on a softball field, but neither did Kevin! But every late Saturday night, you can find Kevin at around 2:30 AM “kerr-plunked” on some stool in the Rhawnhurst Café!)

Bill Wennington – Mike DeNofa (Both were hard-nosed defenders, with hairlines a little higher than they were in their high school days.)

Jud Buechler – Matt Smith (Both had fantastic heads of hair, and neither could play a lick of defense!)

Randy Brown – Mike Braun (Both were some of the fastest players in their respective sports, but couldn’t really do anything else!)

Rusty LaRue – Dennis Sparks (I hear both are very good golfers!)

Luc Longley - Tom Quinn (Both were very unselfish, and would do all the little things that a championship team needs. Not to mention, Longley at times had a very nice curly fro. Also, both clearly had the largest penises on their respective teams!)

Pete Myers – Yank (Both were members of previous teams, but got their outright releases before the championship runs!)

Jerry Krause – Fat Jack (Both not so slim, raging alcoholics who make the most unbelievable Bloody Marys!)

Jerry Reinsdorf – Dennis Elmer (Some fans and columnists have accused Reinsdorf of breaking up the championship Bulls team after their third straight title and sixth in eight years. The Full Moon probably will face the same fate because of this absolute Jew of an owner!)

Ron Harper – Johnny Mac (The fakest, most meaningless, half-important players on each team. Both were really just there to get a free championship ring, which easily would have been won with or without them. Harper would do the same with the early 2000 Lakers.)

Dickey Simpkins – Juddy (They’re not really comparable, except for the fact that they kinda look alike! Plus, they both have really cute nicknames!)

Scott Burrell – Brian Wolf (Young players on great teams. Not really big contributors, but centerpieces for the future. Just look at how well Burrell did in future years!)

Toni Kukoc – Jim Cassidy (These intelligent, multi-talented southpaws had a lot in common. They both can and would hit it anywhere on the field/court. Plus, the Croatians were the inventors of the modern day quilt!)

Dennis Rodman – John Greenwald (Both were gritty, hard-nosed, and very controversial. Both really enjoy dressing in drag! Also, both have used more colors in their hair than a Crayola box of 64!)

Phil Jackson – Keith Patterson (Some have called Keith the “Zen-Masturbater.” Both were very sharp and strategic master motivators. But, Keith gets the slight advantage because he actually also helped his team on the field as its dynamic pitcher. Also, I’ve heard Phil Jackson is also very fond of tin foil!)

Scootie Pippen – Tom Gleason (Both played second fiddle to the greatest that ever played each respective sport! But, both were the second most important key ingredients to a championship team.)

Michael Jordan – Joe Wolf (Come on! He’s lucky to even be mentioned in the same breath as the greatest Left-Centerfielder ever!)

[Smitty Buechler]

Smitty's take :
Buechler would become best known for his four-year tenure (1994-1998) with the Chicago Bulls. With his former college teammate Steve Kerr, Buechler provided clutch shooting off the bench and played a key role during the Bulls’ second three-peat (1996-1998).... This sounds like a great comparison for me and I am especially glad that you didn't make Juddy this guy on name alone...lol

Two little known facts about both the real Buechler and real Smith:

Buechler was also an All-American volleyball player at Arizona. As a two sport athlete, he earned the nickname "The Judge".

Real Matt Smith:
Played volleyball for Northeast High whose team lost only one match his senior year..unfortunately it was the Championship. His nickname was "Smitty"!

[PETE ROSE]

Dearest Gary Maddox : The true team to compare are these jr.....You mooners were a collection of decent abeit underacheiving s-ballers until the lucky day a true winner dropped into your needy lifes.......I personally transformed a group oh shucks maybe next year, that damn ump killed us,but we beat them during the regular season winers, into a f---- them this is are title snarling juggernaut!!!! The comparisons are many (1) QUINNY and BAKE MCBRIDE---2 of the games best afros as well tablesetters from the leadoff spot (2)DENNIS vs. GREG LUZINSKI---2 capable hitters who have NO business in the outfield during big games(3)JUDDY vs. MANNY TRILLO---2clutch hitters who are the leagues best at turning two!!! (4)MIKE SCHMIDT vs. JOE WOLFE--- Immensly taltented me 1st players in need of a leader/mentor who has seen and done it all to show how to be a consement player /captain ...MVP's in need of some tough love from a hall of famer ,a man with more hits than any man alive (5)BRIAN WOLFE vs. BOB BOONE---A young cather who like boonie had the pleasure of playing with the likes of me...And like boonie young wolfe knows that should he stumble and drop a pop-up i"ll be there to catch it for him before it falls (6) MIKE MADDOX vs. KEVIN WOLFE---Incredible similarities !!!Both have superstar brothers while sucking themselves..2 future HOFers and 2 Betty Ford Clinic patients...(7)KEITH vs. PAUL OWENS---Both assembled title winners while contributing nothing at the plate...Also Paul looked like a chicken and Keith dances the naked chicken dance...( DEL UNSER vs. J CASS----2 out of this world playoff clutch hitters who played there best at crunch time (9) Fat Jack vs. SAM MALONE-----2 washed up old drunk used to be players who know support the team the best way possible....BEER!!!!!! I could go on but you get the picture... LETS PLAY 2, LOVE ERNIE BANKS

[W-O-L-F]

Good Post, Vet! But maybe at some point, you will start spelling my, Kevin's, and Brian's last name right! Like the animal that howls at the moon. Let's try together: W O L F. (NO "E" on the end genius!)

[PAT SAJAK]

Dear Wolf Family : I wish to apoligize for the misspelling of your family name..I watched the box scores to the moon platoon games this year and on the fielding next to K.Wolfe there was always at least 1 E so I thought it was part of the name... not for errors...I suppose I should have realized when during your marvelous John Greenwald led playoff run his name in the fielding boxscore often said K.Wolf EEEEE ..Sorry for the Mistake!!!Since I added vowels to your name I will leave out some now o.k. ......Kevin Wolf is a DRNK... he cnt catch a fly ball...As a pitcher Keith scks... Brendan's lefthanded glove blws...xoxo Carl Yastremski

[Vanna White]

***************** WHEEL OF FORTUNE *********************


CLUE: This legendary softball dynamic duo (with a combined age of 127 years old) helped show a bunch of inexperienced youngsters how to win a championship!


_ O H _
G _ E E _ W _ L _

&

G L E _

[Virginia Wolfe]

I like the new 'E' added to the last name. It's very distinguished. It's like you guys became British and started reading classic literature and watching PBS. When does the spring Polo league start?