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[Achy Breaky Heart]

I was sitting on the toilet when I heard the esteemed Lazy -Eye Stuart scott say "The Greatest Black Coach ever has passed away" I was aghast with remorse!!So while crying I reminised....Hell I was just at his 30 th birthday last month...Then I thought at least he went happy after last falls championship...I chuckled when remembering banging his aunt when we were supposed to be babysitting him...Oh the laughter ole "TEENY WEENY" gave us at the Phils opener,his legendary dance-off at Mollys etc...I thought I'd never be able to listen to Steve Winwood again without welling up....I found myself almost wishing he'd gotten hit by a bus when he ran onto Bustelton Ave.last week in his classic races vs.Smitty......At least we would have been able to say goodbye....After flushing you could imagine my surprise when BOO YA BOY said the story was about Eddie Robinson.......Are you kidding me???Keith is by far a greater negro coach...He's a black national treasure....Long live KP!!!


John "grambling" Greenwald

[Niggas aroun' da WORLD!]

The only 2 things that Keith has in common with black men is a touch of dancing rhythm & unemployment! Besides that, he is as white as a cracker can get! He is hung like a light switch, slow as molasses, has the vertical jump of the late Christopher Reeve, & has no illegitimate children (that we know of.)

[COACH P]

a) my ass is a carbon copy of C.Barkley
b)I converse as intelligently as P.Ewing
c)my knuckles scrape the ground
d)I pitch as good as Chuck McElroy
e)I run as fast as Ryan Howard
f) my middle name is Urkel

you see im black as you bro!!!!

[Antwoinne from the Block]

Yo hommie! Yo you come correct when yo representin' my nigga Keif Patterdizzle! That nigga is a born-again brotha! He got a hooptie for a ride! He ain't be havin' no screen door! His wifey is a white girl (like most us young brothas who can't handle the drama of the sistas!) And by the way he usually smells, he stays as far away from a shower as he does a J.O.B!!! Yo... you be knowin' how us niggas don't like the water? But much love to Terrence Howard, Bernie Mac, & those young brothas for jumpin' into the black man's kryptonite (A swimming pool!) Oh... and Keif.... you ate all my cheese motha-fucka! Yo ignant ass knows I can't get no more cheese until the 15th of the mont (EXPLANATION: For some reason, black people can't pronounce the "h" sound in the word "month.") AIGHT HOMMIES..... much respect! Two times! One Love! HOLLA!!!!!!!

WAKE UP, WAKE UP, WAKE UP.... IT'S THE FIRST OF THE MONT!!!!!!
GET UP, GET UP, GET UP..... GOTTA GET THAT WELFARE CHEESE!!!!
-- Bone Thugs & Harmony